You might be doing great but when you look around, are you starting to see others give up? They set this goal and now they’re already going back to old habits?
Clients have asked me before, “Dani how do I motivate others to succeed, as well?” It can be frustrating to see those you are close to start things and then give up! I’ve run into this with my kids a lot, my husband and even in myself.
How do you motivate the unwilling?
Everyone is motivated by something. Learning what motivates others can help you to pull the best out in your team, your family and others around you. Use this simple tool to quickly identify what motivates them and use it to encourage even the most unwilling.
To answer your question, let me share a story. You may or may not know this, but I used to be homeless. I lived in my car for a month before finally getting so sick and tired of being sick and tired, I decided to do something about it.
If you had tried to motivate me anytime during that month, I wouldn’t have listened. Mainly because I was busy having a pity party and enjoyed blaming everyone else. I just wasn’t ready.
A lot of people say they want success, say they want to lose weight, make more money, get a better job. But they really don’t! And that is okay. We are all at different points in our journey.
You can try to push people out of their ruts, but they might be having fun in there. I wasn’t ready to listen until day 31 of being homeless. Who knows how long it will take others to be ready to listen or actually pull themselves out of the hole!
So what are you supposed to do in this situation?
The only thing you can do… love people where they happen to be in their life. Support them right where they are, realizing they might be at a different place than you in their life journey. When you are there for them, you will learn what motivates them and can just encourage that particular hot-button area!
It puts stress on your relationships when you to try to force others to succeed. And if you push, you will push them away. It shows you don’t support them in their struggles. It shows them your agenda is more important than theirs.